One of the most significant milestones that we all wait for expectantly and celebrate is the first word that comes out of your child’s little mouth. When babble gives way to real words that actually mean something! That first word may seem to just drop in out of the blue one glorious day, but in fact, there are many underlying cogs turning, and skills that need to be mastered before your child will be ready to say their first words. Let me illustrate these cogs to you by setting a scene:
Imagine you are the proud parent watching your child give the most amazing performance at their school play. Your child says their words clearly, matches their facial expressions to the emotion and intent of the script, and uses their hands and body beautifully to convey their message. You are astounded at what you can see. What you can’t directly see, however, are all the hours and hours of practice that your child has gone through to get ready for that moment. You also can’t see the backstage crew working tirelessly with lights and sound, costumes and props, timing and coordination to have everything running smoothly so that your child’s performance can be everything that it is.
This is similar to language. Your child’s expressive language is what you can see on the stage. It’s their use of sounds and words, gestures and facial expressions to relay a message effectively to you. It can also be their use of signs, or alternative methods like devices or picture exchange systems if that’s what they need to communicate. It’s how they tell you what they are thinking, feeling or needing. It’s the most obvious part of language, the part that most people put all their attention onto – what is your child saying?!
What you can’t directly see, however, are all the hours and hours and months and months adding up to at least a year of “cumulative” practice interacting with people, that builds essential skills that have to be in place before your child is ready to say their first word. These skills are called “prelinguistic skills”(or “pre-language” skills). They start developing the day your baby is born and include things like your baby’s ability to respond to their environment and to the people around them with enjoyment of social interaction; it’s their attention; their ability to match their attention to what you are atten
ding to; it’s taking turns; copying actions, gestures, sounds and words; playing appropriately with toys; and turning on their voice to make something happen. Very importantly, it’s their ability to initiate interaction with others and use gestures to say something (like pointing or waving). There are in fact eleven of these skills that deserve days of discussion each. If these skills are not in place, then your child will not be ready to take the stage with spoken words. When toddlers or children are delayed in their language development, there are always gaps somewhere in these prelinguistic skills which need to be addressed.
“Backstage” of expressive language, is an extremely important prelinguistic skill, and that is your child’s understanding. This goes hand in hand with cognitive development, which is how your child learns and remembers, pays attention and problem solves. Understanding is foundational to expressive language, as it prepares your child to use words. If your child does not understand a word, they will not be able to say that word with meaning. A common mistake many adults make is to focus all their attention on what a child is saying without helping their children to first understand words.
In order for your child to be ripe and ready to take the stage with their first words, they need to have mastered the prelinguistic skills, which are usually in place by around 12 months. So how do you help your child get there? One of the most important things is to ensure that your child’s main caregiver, be it yourself, an au pair, a nanny or granny, is interacting with and speaking to your child as often as possible, all day long. Don’t let your child check out and be on their own, or in front of a screen for long stretches of time. Rather, have them with you and near you. Then chat together using conversation as well as lovely, simple language with lots of single words and short phrases, so that your child can understand easily and copy you when they are ready to. Use every opportunity in everyday life to engage, to giggle, to catch eyes, to speak, to read books and very importantly, to play together. Also be sure to interact during every day routines like nappy changing time, bath time, feeding time, washing hands time etc, as the repetitive nature of these tasks is perfect for bonding and laying the essential foundations for your child’s language. Your child can only master these essential skills through consistent interaction with significant people around them every day. So help your child get those cogs turning, and then celebrate their amazing little achievement when that first word drops in one glorious day!
Disclaimer: Some children find it more difficult than other children to develop their prelinguistic and communication skills for a number of different reasons, which are not the fault of the parent or the child. If you are concerned about your child’s language development, contact a Speech Therapist/Pathologist in your area to get professional guidance and help sooner rather than later.
